Obama: Dump costly men, hire cheap women

April 16, 2014

From ScrappleFace.com.

At a White House news conference today, President Obama encouraged employers to boost their profits by slashing expenses, or in his words: “Dump costly men, hire cheap women.”

“With women earning just 77 cents on the dollar compared with men,” Obama said, “they’re a real bargain, allowing you to move 23 percent of your HR budget straight to the bottom line.”

The president noted that, “Not only are women cheap and renewable, but they’re smart and they work hard, often doing jobs that no man would do. And some of them have even bigger biceps than their husbands.”

An unnamed economist at the American Woman Cooperative Marketing Board agreed.

“If women really earn so much less,” he said, “why would a business ever hire a man? All other things being equal, it makes no economic sense.”

However, a spokesman for Man Worker International noted that despite their proclivity to engage in risky after-hours behaviors and to die sooner, men are still a good deal.

“Sure, they cost a little more up front,” the spokesman acknowledged, “but men consistently put work before family, senselessly devote their lives to developing boring but useful expertise, and rarely get pregnant.”

President Obama signs an executive order, firing every male employee in the executive branch, to be replaced with “cheap, renewable women,” saving taxpayers millions of dollars this year alone.

By Scott Ott.


The last full measure of your tax dollars

April 15, 2014

mckee****

theirs

The Tax Auditmccoy

mckee

ramirez*

corruption

foden

allie

 

mccoy*

mckee*

macnelly


Unsung hero

April 11, 2014

Another wonderful short film from Thailand, in the same spirit as last year’s “Giving.” If this doesn’t warm your heart, you’d better check your pulse to make sure you’re not dead.

 


Go for the gold

April 11, 2014

A multimillionaire nearing the end of his life was distraught because he had worked so hard for his wealth and he wanted to be able to take it with him when he died. He prayed and asked God if he could do so.

“Sorry,” God said. “Rules are rules.”

But the man begged and pleaded, and eventually God relented.

“All right, you win,” God said. “I’ll make an exception just this once. You can bring one suitcase.”

Overjoyed, the man took his largest suitcase, filled it with bars of pure gold, and set it beside his bed.

Not long afterward, the man died and arrived at the gates of heaven. St. Peter took one look at the suitcase and said, “You can’t bring that in here.”

The man explained that he had special permission from God. St. Peter was skeptical, but went to check the story out. After a while he returned.

“You’re right,” Peter said. “God says you’re allowed one suitcase. But I’ll have to check its contents before letting it through.”

St. Peter opened the suitcase to inspect the worldly goods that the man had found too precious to leave behind, and said in astonishment, “You brought pavement?”


Are two heads better than one?

April 10, 2014

Peekaboo.


Spring fever

April 8, 2014

spring


About time those scofflaws got what they deserved

April 6, 2014

 


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