Let the memory live again

February 3, 2016

Stan and Lois, both in their eighties, were becoming more and more forgetful. On the advice of their doctor, they began carrying small notebooks and pencils with them so they could write down things they wanted to remember.

One evening while they were watching television, Stan got up from his chair.

Lois said, “Where are you going?”

Stan said, “To the kitchen for a glass of water.”

Lois said, “While you’re there, will you get me a bowl of ice cream?”

Stan said, “Sure.”

Lois said, “You’d better write it down so you won’t forget.”

Stan said, “I don’t need to write it down. You want a bowl of ice cream. I can remember that.”

Lois said, “Can you put some strawberries on top?”

Stan said, “Sure, I can do that.”

Lois said, “You’d better write it down so you won’t forget.”

Stan said, “I don’t need to write it down! Ice cream and strawberries. I can remember that.”

Lois said, “I want some whipped cream on it too. You’d better write it down. I’m sure you’ll forget if you don’t write it down.”

Stan said, “I don’t need to write it down! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream! How hard is that to remember?”

Stan shuffled off to the kitchen, grumbling all the way. He was gone for about twenty minutes, and when he returned, he handed Lois a plate of bacon and eggs.

Lois looked at the plate, then looked at Stan reproachfully and said, “Where’s my toast?”

Happy Groundhog Day

February 2, 2016

I can’t brain today, I have the dumb

February 1, 2016

How to know you’re in a country church

January 31, 2016

Four generations of the same family sit together at worship.

People wonder why Noah let those two coyotes on the ark.

The preacher asks Bubba to help take up the offering and five guys stand up.

Opening day of hunting season is as an official church holiday.

The choir is known as the O.K. Chorale.

The sermon is about Jesus feeding the five thousand, and folks want to know whether the fish were bass or catfish.

Baptism is referred to as “branding.”

Finding and returning lost sheep are more than just a parable.

High notes on the organ set the dogs to howling.

The final benediction is, “Y’all come back now, hear?”

Some beautiful music for Sunday

January 31, 2016

“Ständchen” was one of the last compositions of the prolific but short-lived Franz Peter Schubert, whose 219th birthday is today. Although composed for piano and vocal soloist, it has been transcribed for many different instruments and instrumental ensembles. This setting for piano and flute is especially beautiful.

Happy Caturday

January 30, 2016

Think maybe I’ll just stay home tomorrow

January 29, 2016


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