Miss Carlson assigned her fifth graders to write an essay entitled “If I Were a Millionaire.”
All of the students began writing, except for one girl who sat at her desk with her arms folded.
“What’s the matter, Chloe?” asked the teacher. “Why aren’t you writing?”
“I’m waiting for my secretary,” said Chloe.
Miss Carlson gave her an A+.
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My sister’s son flunked out of college. I asked her if the kid had flunked out because of a lack of brains. “Yes,” she said. “Alack and a lass.”
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At seven o’clock in the morning, Billy’s mother called to him, “Billy, get up — it’s time to get ready for school.”
There was no answer. Billy’s mother called again, ”Billy, get up! It’s time to get ready for school!”
Still there was no answer. Billy’s mother went to his room and shook him.
“Billy! Get up and get ready for school!”
“I’m not going to school, Mom,” said Billy. “All the kids hate me.”
“Doesn’t make any difference,” said his mother. “Get up and get ready for school!”
“But Mom, all the teachers hate me too.”
“I don’t care! Get up and get ready for school!”
“But Mom, why should I go to school when everyone there hates me?’
“Why? I’ll tell you why! Because you’re the principal!”
YouTube claims this was made in 1962, but according to the fine print in the film itself, it was made in 1957. Either way, if you’re a baby boomer who went grocery shopping with Mom back when you were a young whippersnapper, this will bring back memories. If you watch all the way to the end you’ll see how much an average mother paid for a shopping cart full of groceries in 1957 (warning: not for the faint of heart).