You finally clean your house, hoping to find loose change.
The local loan shark sees you coming, and turns and runs the other way.
You’re formulating a plan to rob the food bank.
You can’t remember whose picture is on the nickel.
You pawn the spare tire from your car.
Credit card companies don’t try to get you to transfer your other credit card balances to theirs.
Your baloney has no first name.
At communion, you go back for seconds.
You try to take out a loan, and the bank asks for your firstborn child as collateral.
American Express calls and says, “Leave home without it!”
Long distance companies don’t call to try to persuade you to switch.
You rob Peter… and then rob Paul.