Mommy dearest

Almost everyone has heard by now about the two spoiled brats who attempted to sue their mother for “bad mothering.” Among the despicable acts allegedly committed by said mother were failing to buy the children toys that they wanted, giving her son a birthday card that didn’t contain any money, and asking her daughter to return home from a party at midnight. For the emotional distress that these horrifying abuses inflicted on them, the plaintiffs sought damages of $50,000. They were represented in their suit by their father, who was divorced from their mother in 1995.

Presented with so much silliness, pettiness, and downright stupidity, it’s hard to know where to begin. Just for starters, if you were planning to sue your mom for being a lousy mother, wouldn’t you try to come up with something a little worse to accuse her of than giving you a birthday card without any money in it? Do these kids have any clue at all how ridiculous they look? As for the $50,000 they hoped to extract from their mother, would it not have been easier, faster, and a lot less embarrassing for their indulgent father, a prosperous attorney, to have simply written them each a check for $25,000? It would have saved him a lot of time — time that he could have spent doing legitimate legal work, for which he would have been able to collect the usual fees. The fact that dear old Dad was willing to go along with this nonsense should make any normal observer question just how much he loves his (admittedly not very lovable) children. In fact, the whole sordid business looks like a case of a man seeking to wreak vengeance on his ex-wife — although one would think any normal man would be too ashamed to make a jackass of himself publicly in this manner.

Here is The Bard of Murdock‘s comment on the incident:

I plan to sue my mother,
And dear old dad’s estate,
For how they made me suffer
From ages two to eight.

My yearly birthday parties,
I’m sure they will confess,
Were singular in purpose:
Emotional distress.

For me, no fancy presents,
No cash or bonds or stocks;
Instead the wrapping paper
Held underwear and socks.

No Tonka toys or Legos,
No licorice or gum,
Just different kinds of clothing
From dear old dad and mum.

When on my best behavior,
I’d get a brand new shirt;
And when I was atrocious,
I wouldn’t get dessert.

So is it any wonder
I’m batty, daft and mad,
And look for compensation
In Me v. Mom and Dad?

Copyright 2011 by The Bard of Murdock. Used with permission.

3 Responses to Mommy dearest

  1. bydesign001 says:

    Excellent post. I am a fan of the Bard of Murdock. He puts together the greatest prose which is the perfect way to end your post.

    It does appear that the father was seeking revenge. The court should bill him and his spoiled brats for wasting the court’s time. Such an unappreciative lot. No doubt they got that from their father.

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  2. […] When I first saw this post, I thought it must be a joke, but it is not! Almost everyone has heard by now about the two spoiled brats who attempted to sue their mother for “bad mothering.” Among the despicable acts allegedly committed by said mother were failing to buy the children toys that they wanted, giving her son a birthday card that didn’t contain any money, and asking her daughter to return home from a party at midnight. For the emotional distress that these horrifying abuses inflicted on them, the plaintiffs … Read More […]

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  3. There just are no words ….

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