In an effort to shore up his support among female voters, Barack Obama recently posted a little slide presentation on his campaign website about the life of a cartoon character named Julia who is supposed to represent American women. At every stage of her life, from toddlerhood till her retirement, Julia depends on dear old Uncle Sam for everything she needs — education, college loans, a job, health care, fair treatment in the workplace, birth control pills, abortions, retirement benefits, you name it — whatever she wants or needs, Uncle Sam supplies, at no cost to Julia. Who pays for all this largesse is never mentioned; I guess we’re not supposed to ask. All we’re supposed to notice is how weak and fragile and helpless Julia is, how big and strong and wonderful Uncle Sam is, and what an irredeemably miserable mess Julia’s life would be were it not for Uncle Sam’s boundless generosity and bottomless pockets.
The Bard of Murdock comments:
My parents call me Julia,
But friends may call me Jules.
I live on more than what I make
By following the rules.
At times when I am running short
I call on Uncle Sam.
He never questions what I spend,
And loves me as I am.
He gives me discounts for my loans
To keep the payments low,
And when my cards have all been maxed
He covers what I owe.
He pays for all my health care bills
So I can convalesce,
Whenever I am overwhelmed
Or suffering from stress.
And when I raise my only son
I’ll teach him best I can,
To ask for help from Uncle Sam –
Cause he’s a family man.
For further enlightenment:
The Times When You Saw Only One Set of Footprints Are When POTUS Carried You, by Peter Suderman
Julia’s Circle of Life, by David Burge
Mamas, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Julia, by Michelle Malkin
Who the Hell Is Julia, and Why Am I Paying for Her Whole Life? by David Harsanyi
The Life of Peter, Julia’s Sperm Donor, by William Teach
The cradle-to-grave, government-supported existence of “Julia”, by Ed Morrissey