Letter from an Obama voter

The following letter appeared in the January 23 edition of the Carteret County News-Times.

Beaufort, N.C.

Jan. 17, 2013


Republicans and so-called conservatives are at it again. They are claiming that the Constitution gives people the right to have guns without the permission of the government. If that were true, then how could New York and Chicago have laws against it?

We Democrats are sick and tired of Republicans constantly using the Constitution to cover up their true plans, which are to make us all afraid of everyone else. Our great president came from a civilized part of the country where there is strict gun control, and he is only trying to bring the benefits of that more modern way of living to the rest of us. I don’t know the exact statistics, but I’m quite certain that Chicago is a lot safer than Morehead City, when it comes to gun violence.

But do Republicans and conservatives listen to the voice of reason? No, of course not. All they want to do is whine and complain about how gun control and wealth redistribution violate the Constitution, as if the Constitution were all that great, anyway. There are a lot of things that need to be changed about the Constitution, I’d say, and President Obama needs to change it.

The Republicans are just trying to stand in the way, because the president is black. They even dared to question whether he was born in this country. I think all this demonstrates that the Constitution needs to be amended when it comes to the qualifications for being president. Right now, it says that a person has to be 35 years old and be a natural born citizen. Well, that is obviously unfair because there are a great many otherwise qualified people who cannot run for president because their mothers had to have a C-section.  But because the Constitution was written a hundred years ago, nobody even thought of the discrimination that would result from a doctor having to deliver a baby in this unnatural way. Now that we Democrats are in control of the government, that’s just one more thing we should change in our drive to make life fair.

Please withhold my name because I don’t want to get crank calls.


9 Responses to Letter from an Obama voter

  1. Wraith says:

    I call satire.

    Absolutely brilliant satire. He had me going for a bit there…!!


  2. Are you sure it was satire? Sounds like the same guy waiting next to me in the doctor’s office last week.


  3. […] here is an impassioned letter said to be from an exceptionally intelligent and well informed […]


  4. […] here is an impassioned letter said to be from an exceptionally intelligent and well informed […]


  5. cmblake6 says:

    I would SO borrow this from you if I hadn’t already put it up a couple of days ago. This has got to be satire, or the paper used some serious spelchek. Brilliant, IMHO.


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