Great moments in marriage

Herb had too much to drink at the office New Year’s party, and when he woke up the next morning his head felt ready to explode. He could recall almost nothing of the previous night, and he dreaded the thought of facing his wife, who he suspected would have a few choice words for him.

But when he opened his eyes, he saw that there were two extra-strength aspirin and a glass of water on the bedside table, along with a note in his wife’s handwriting. It read: 

Dearest Herb, 

Your breakfast is on the stove. Brooke said she would do the dishes and clean up the kitchen, so you can just relax and take it easy. I’ve gone out to buy groceries so I can make your favorite supper tonight. 

Your loving wife, 

Alice

p.s. I’m going to stop at the smoke shop on the way home and pick up a box of your favorite cigars. I love you, darling!

Puzzled, Herb set the note down. He took the aspirin, then he went to the kitchen, where he found a hot breakfast, hot coffee, and the morning newspaper waiting for him. His daughter Brooke was busy loading the dishwasher. 

“Morning, Dad,” she greeted him cheerfully.

“Morning, honey,” said Herb. “By any chance, were you awake when I got home last night?”

“I sure was,” she said, giggling. “You were totally hammered. You threw up in the bushes by the front door, and when you came inside, you fell over the coffee table and broke it. Mom and I had to practically carry you to bed.”

Herb was flummoxed. “So why is your mother out buying cigars for me and planning to make my favorite supper tonight?”

“Good question,” said Brooke. “I guess it’s because after we got you into the bedroom, Mom started taking your clothes off, and you hollered, ‘Leave me alone — I’m married!’”

Broken coffee table: $250.00

Two extra-strength aspirin: $.34

Saying the right thing at the right time: priceless

 

aspirin

24 Responses to Great moments in marriage

  1. Nancy says:

    Reblogged this on "OUR WORLD".

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Reblogged this on saywhatumean2say and commented:
    Purrfect…..Happy Happy. xxxx oooo dru

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Bernadette says:

    Oh that is a good tale with a great moral.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Reblogged this on Kate McClelland and commented:
    Hahahahaa! made me laugh

    Liked by 1 person

  5. floridaborne says:

    Didn’t expect the ending. Laughed until I snorted tea. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Haha haha… this is GREAT!!

    I stopped by to tell you that I am taking a break from blogging for awhile. This isn’t a New Year’s resolution. It’s just that I made a resolution last year, on January 1, 2016, that I would finish my memoir before the year was through. This did not happen, not even close. And when I looked back over the past year and asked myself WHY I did not achieve my goal, what stood out in my mind were all the hours I spent in a typical day, reading and commenting on blogs.

    For this reason, I have made my blog private temporarily and unfollowed all of the blogs I was following. I miss my blogging friends already! Hopefully I will finish my manuscript and be back soon. God bless you in this new year! ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  7. mhembroff says:

    Cute little story

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Rae Longest says:

    How priceless is right!!!

    Liked by 2 people

  9. angyjenks says:

    I love it.. 😂😂

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Reblogged this on Writer's Treasure Chest and commented:
    No words needed… 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Ha,ha! This is a good one 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Absolutely brilliant – and mind you, much better received than my New Years Day awakening, ha. Cats aren’t that candid are they?

    Liked by 1 person

  13. […] Great moments in marriage […]

    Liked by 1 person

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