From The Babylon Bee.
Seven-Year-Old Quits Christmas Pageant After Being Cast As Sheep Again
DAVENPORT, IA—In an announcement that rocked the Christmas Pageant world, seven-year-old Emma Stenson told reporters Wednesday she refuses to participate in the church nativity play after being cast as a sheep for the fourth year in a row.
The blond, curly-haired Stenson, whose parents describe as normally very compliant, said she was tired of being typecast.
“You mean to tell me Skylar gets to be Mary, and I’m the quiet, dumb animal again? Please! I could be ten times the Mary she is, and everyone knows it,” the agitated second grader reportedly said, adding that she has already paid her dues in the pasture.
“I wonder if Skylar playing Mary has anything to do with her dad being an elder,” she went on. “Probably just coincidence, right? Give me a break.”
Stenson added, “I’m so much more than livestock, and if they can’t see that—it’s their loss.”