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This entry was posted on Saturday, November 21st, 2020 at 10:42 am and is filed under animal crackers. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.
This entry was posted on Saturday, November 21st, 2020 at 10:42 am and is filed under animal crackers. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.
My father was a very successful businessman, but he was ruined in the stock market crash. A big stockbroker jumped out the window and fell on his pushcart. —Jackie Mason
I ordered a chicken and and egg from Amazon. I’ll let you know.
Home sweet home
Bob's sister Hannah
Bob's sister Ada
Bob's brother Otto
Bob's sister Eve
Bob's sister Nan
A baby picture of Bob and his siblings (clockwise from upper left: Otto, Eve, Hannah, Ada, Bob, and Nan)
Bob's childhood home
Bob's mom and dad
Bob in his youth
Bob's cousin Alphonse
Bob's Uncle Ralph and Aunt Edna
Bob's cousin Archibald
Bob's stepbrother Herbie (who really needs to quit smoking)
Bob's cousin Chester
Bob's Great Uncle Norbert and Great Aunt Phyllis
Bob's cousin Saffron (who will do anything for a drink)
Bob's cousin Thorndike
Bob's brother-in-law Vinnie
Bob's cousin Orville, who loves the Green Bay Packers
Bob's nieces Lulu and Bitsy, the biker chicks
Bob's stepsister Eloise, with the twins, Rudy and Trudy
Bob's Uncle Henry and Aunt Rowena
Bob's niece Esmerelda (who likes to live dangerously)
Bob's Great Uncle Arthur up in Saskatchewan
Bob's cousin Louie, the grackle of grumpiness
Miss Screech, Bob's journalism teacher
Bob's nephew Winthrop, who loves sports
Bob's Uncle Seymour and Aunt Bernice
Bob's second cousin Schlomo in Brooklyn
Bob's nephew Baxter
Bob's cousin Darrell
Bob's sister-in-law Delphine, who volunteers at the animal shelter
Percy the Pickpocket, Bob's third cousin once removed (the relative no one likes to talk about... every family has one)
The Bluebird of Happiness™ (no relation to Bob)
A pair of boobies (also no relation to Bob, but included for readers who desire titillation)
Bluebird Bitter™, the beer they named for Bob
More great laughs. I love the bats!
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Lol lol lol!
My daughter and her partner were recently awakened by a bat falling down the chimney and then flying madly around the room. My daughter said her guy was “screaming like a girl.” They threw the comforter over their heads and scurried out of the room, shutting the door behind them. Then they googled and found a bat removal expert named Bubba. I kid you not. When they called to ask how soon he could get there, Bubba said “We can be there within the hour. But you do know we charge for this, right?”
Like… DUH!
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I would gladly have paid Bubba to come to my house when I had a bat flying around my living room. I had to awaken my husband from a sound slumber to deal with the situation, and he was not amused. He said “Can’t it just stay there until morning?”
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“Can’t it just stay there until morning?”
NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
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I would’ve waited a til he was back asleep, waited a bit, and then pinched him really really hard. Then gone “oh no, you didn’t get bit, did you? I chased it under the door. We’d better call someone…” and watch him flail and freak.
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🙂
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Lol! That might have started a riot!
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Literally HOWLING with laughter at “screaming like a girl.”
Every now and then there’s a guy like that on American’s Funniest Home Videos. It always feels so mean to laugh like I do, but I can’t help it!
I would love to know the story behind why Bubba (who I really thought you were gonna say ended up being a cat!) felt the need to mention that they charge for the service. . .
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Lol! I’m glad you got a good laugh out of that. Yes, I wondered the same thing, why did Bubba feel the need to say that he expected to get paid for his service! My daughter described Bubba and his business partner after they left. They sounded like Duck Dynasty dudes to me.
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Many, many moons ago, when I was a church musician, we used to get bats in the church every now and then, and more than one mass was disrupted by a bat swooping around the sanctuary. One morning I was in my usual place at the keyboard and got through an entire service before I realized that a bat had been sleeping just a few inches away from me the entire time. I reached down to pick up my books from the floor and nearly grabbed the bat, which was hanging from the step next to the keyboard.
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Wow!! You must be an amazing musician.
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Not at all; I was merely adequate. I inherited the job (for which my only qualification were a few years of piano lessons in elementary school) when the woman who had been the church’s organist for decades succumbed to cancer. I agreed to fill in until such time as the church could hire a real keyboard player, but once they had me doing it every week, they stopped looking for one. Sigh…
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Amazing… AND humble! 😀
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Awww, you’re so sweet. ♥️
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Yeah, I had that same kinda picture in my head. (Being called “Bubba” will do that 😉 ) Thing is, at least where I come from, that also includes a shotgun and great skill at wielding it, so. . .
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Reblogged this on Chris The Story Reading Ape's Blog and commented:
The Pickles cartoon actually happened to me when we had cats 😂
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😀 😀 😀
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Hilarious. My favorite was the pets asking for medical advice. 😀 — Suzanne
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