Bored of education

August 14, 2020

A young man, fresh out of college, reported for his first day of work at a grocery store.

The manager greeted him with a smile and a handshake, then handed him a broom and said, “Your first job will be to sweep out the stockroom.”

“But I’m a college graduate,” protested the young man.

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” said the manager.  “I had no idea. Here, give me the broom, and I’ll show you how it’s done.”

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A college student told his professor that he would have to miss a scheduled exam because of a funeral. The professor expressed his sympathy, and told the student he could take it the following week.

But the next week the student once again missed the exam, due to another funeral. The professor told him he would have to take it the following week.

“I’ll take it next week if no one dies,” said the student.

“How is it that so many people you know have died in such a short time?” asked the professor.

“I don’t know any of these people,” said the student. “But I’m the only gravedigger in town.”

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The dean of admissions at an agricultural college was interviewing a prospective student.

“What made you choose farming as a career?” asked the dean.

“I dream of making a million dollars in farming, just like my father,” replied the student.

“Your father made a million dollars in farming?” said the dean.

“No,” said the student. “But he always dreamed of it.”


Friday happy dance

August 14, 2020


Coronatoons

August 13, 2020


Never try to outsmart a woman unless you are one

August 13, 2020


Happy Middle Child Day

August 12, 2020

Yes, it’s a real thing.


Wednesday weirdness

August 12, 2020


Cardboard fan in stable condition after being hit by foul ball

August 11, 2020

From The Onion.

BOSTON—Assuring Red Sox Nation that the cutout would make a full recovery, General Manager Brian O’Halloran told reporters Friday that a cardboard fan was in stable condition after being hit by a foul ball.

“We were all horrified by the accident, but thankfully the fan will come away from this incident with just a few dents and crumples,” said O’Halloran, who commended paramedics for rushing to the scene and taping the cutout’s head back on before it was too late.

“The safety of our fans is our top priority. We’re lucky that the cardboard man is okay after that close call. Rest assured, we’re giving him season tickets for life.”

In a related report, a Nationals–Orioles game was suspended after a cardboard fan succumbed to a thunderstorm.


Monday chuckles

August 10, 2020


Senior moments

August 10, 2020


Friday happy dance

August 7, 2020


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