Wednesday weirdness
August 8, 2018
5 Comments | 
circus of life | Tagged: Weird Al Yankovic | 
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Posted by bluebird of bitterness
Summertime classic: Keeping cool
August 7, 2018The temperature in Detroit was 98 degrees and rising on July 8, 1946, when the Goldberg brothers — Lowell, Norman, Hiram, and Maxwell — walked into Henry Ford’s office and sweet-talked his secretary into telling him that four gentlemen were there with the most exciting innovation in the auto industry since the electric starter.
Ford was curious and invited them into his office. They asked him to come out to the parking lot where their car was parked.
They asked him to get into the car, where the temperature was at least 120 degrees. Then they turned on the air conditioner and cooled the car off.
Ford was very excited and invited them back to the office, where he offered them $3,000,000 for the patent.
The brothers replied that they would settle for $2,000,000, but they wanted to have a label that said “The Goldberg Air Conditioner” on the dashboard of each car in which it was installed.
Now old man Ford was proud of the Ford name, and there was no way he was going to put the Goldbergs’ name on his cars. They haggled back and forth for a while, and the Goldbergs finally agreed that Ford could use just their first names on the label.
That is why, to this day, the control on every Ford air conditioner says Lo, Norm, Hi, and Max.
6 Comments | circus of life | Tagged: chuckles, summer, words at play | Permalink
Posted by bluebird of bitterness
Face lift
August 6, 2018
15 Comments | simple pleasures | Tagged: faces | Permalink
Posted by bluebird of bitterness
Sunday funnies
August 5, 2018From The Babylon Bee.
Average American Now Complains More in a Week Than People Living Through the Black Plague Did Their Entire Lives
Demonstrating just how bad modern life has gotten, surveys now show that the average American today complains more in a week than people living during the black plague complained throughout their entire 30-year life span.
“There’s just so much more going wrong now,” said Karen Maxwell, a college student. “Things were just much simpler during the Black Death. All they had to deal with was squalor, starvation, and the constant threat of disease. Nowadays we have microaggressions, student debt, gluten, unequal pay for women, GMOs, problematic things like Scarlett Johansson playing a transgender man. The list just goes on and on. So it’s no wonder we complain more.”
“It just makes sense,” she added before going back to using her smartphone, a device that would have seemed like dark magic to people living just a hundred years ago.
Studies back up Maxwell, as there are recorded only a handful of common complaints from the 14th century such as large boils, lack of food, and everyone dying. In the present day, though, there are thousands of things people complain about daily — poor cell service, traffic jams, unripe avocados, obesity, favorite TV shows being canceled — problems no one six hundred years ago had to deal with at all.
“It’s just a miserable time to live in,” Troy Walker said while eating a burrito in an air conditioned food court, something that would probably confuse and scare a 14th century European. “All the disease back in the 1300s sounds bad, but at least they didn’t have high health care costs from it since they didn’t have health care. And look how we’re being exploited by capitalism.” Walker pointed to his iPhone. “But in plague-ridden Europe, most people had pretty much nothing, so they didn’t have to worry about that.”
More stories of questionable veracity from The Babylon Bee:
Local Mom Drops ‘Bored’ Kids Off at School Three Weeks Early
Man Identifies as Woman, Immediately Receives 23% Pay Cut
Russian Spy Captured, Found to Have Several Smaller Russian Spies Nested Inside
Church Kicks Off Fun-Filled ‘Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God’ Themed VBS
16 Comments | circus of life | Tagged: Babylon Bee, Sunday funnies | Permalink
Posted by bluebird of bitterness
Sunday musical offering
August 5, 2018
Leave a Comment » | comfort & joy, musical offerings | Tagged: Cornell Glee Club, William Dawson | Permalink
Posted by bluebird of bitterness
Caturday funnies — Barkalounger edition
August 4, 2018
26 Comments | animal crackers | Tagged: barkaloungers, cats, dogs | Permalink
Posted by bluebird of bitterness
Friday happy dance
August 3, 2018
2 Comments | circus of life | Tagged: dance, Fred Astaire, Ginger Rogers, memory lane | Permalink
Posted by bluebird of bitterness
