Happy Caturday

July 2, 2022

When you try to make friends with your neighbor, but the neighbor isn’t interested. (This is funnier if you enlarge it to full screen.)

Sleight of hand

June 28, 2022

An oldie but goodie.

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A magician got a gig on a cruise ship. His audience was different every week, so he did the same tricks every time.

The captain’s parrot saw the show every week and soon figured out what was going on in each trick. To the magician’s consternation, the parrot began shouting in the middle of the show:

“It’s not the same hat!”

“He’s hiding the flowers under the table!”

“All the cards are the Ace of Spades!”

The magician was furious, but since it was the captain’s parrot, there was nothing he could do.

One day the ship sprang a leak and sank. The magician and the parrot ended up sharing a lifeboat.

For a long time neither the magician nor the parrot spoke. Finally the parrot broke the silence by saying, “Okay, I give up. What did you do with the ship?” 

How to have a good time with stuff you probably have lying around the house

June 28, 2022

Cheep shots

June 27, 2022

Fowl play

May 2, 2022

Sunday funnies

April 24, 2022

An oldie but goodie.

❧ ❧ ❧

Late one night a burglar broke into a house that he thought was unoccupied. He hadn’t gotten far when he heard a voice say, “Jesus is watching.”

The burglar froze.

After a brief silence the voice repeated, “Jesus is watching.”

The burglar looked where the voice seemed to be coming from, and spotted a parrot in a cage.

“Jesus is watching,” repeated the parrot.

“Shut up, you stupid bird,” said the burglar.

“I’m not a stupid bird,” said the parrot. “I’m John the Baptist.”

“John the Baptist? What kind of idiot names a bird John the Baptist?”

“The same idiot who named the Rottweiler Jesus.”

Find the parakeet!

April 21, 2022

A parakeet lurks among the leaves. See if you can find it.

(click to enlarge)

The solution will appear in the comments section later today.

Happy birthday, Bob

February 18, 2022

It’s been eleven years since the bluebird of bitterness was hatched, and Bob, Nan, Eve, Ada, Hannah, and Otto all agreed that we were overdue for a party with the office staff!

This is Blanche, who works in the mail room. She was in charge of the invitations, which she sent out via Twitter.

Ada hired a photographer for the evening. Unfortunately, his camera was broken, so the only pictures we have are what was caught on the hotel’s security cameras.

This is Seymour, our Avian Resources guy. He made the party hats, and everyone agreed he did a great job!

This is the caterer Eve hired. He was recommended to her by her hairdresser’s boyfriend. Or was it her next-door neighbor’s parole officer? I forget….

No one knows who this kid is. She just happened to be passing through the hotel courtyard while the party was going on. She stopped long enough to snap a few pictures, then moved along. Otto thought she might be from the local TV station.

Smoking wasn’t allowed in the hotel, so Leonard and Marvin had to go up on the roof when they wanted a smoke.

Hubert and Horace are our branch managers. Nan put them in charge of entertainment.

They hired this trio to provide the music. They were good, but loud! My ears are still ringing.

Everyone raved about how good the food was — especially the bird’s nest cupcakes. Yum!

To no one’s surprise, Ralph drank a little too much. Ralph is the reason we always have a designated flier.

Otto got a stomach ache from eating too many cupcakes. He claims he only had two, but Otto is notoriously bad at counting, especially where food is concerned.

By then Bob was having trouble staying awake, so everyone agreed it was time to call it a day.

Glad you were able to share in our celebration!

You gotta have heart

February 13, 2022

Find the umbrella!

January 13, 2022

An umbrella lurks among the ostriches. See if you can find it.

(click to enlarge)

The solution will appear in the comments section later today.

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