Happy birthday, Bob: Now we are six

February 16, 2017

When the bluebird of bitterness (a.k.a. Bob) decided to go into the blogging business six years ago, he asked his siblings Otto, Ada, Nan, Eve, and Hannah to join him. Since jobs for unemployed birds without any marketable skills were pretty thin on the ground, all of them eagerly accepted. Well, “eagerly” might be overstating the case a little… still, six years of long hours and lousy pay later, they’re all still here, and everyone agreed that it was an anniversary worth celebrating.

Nan handled the invitations, primarily because she’s the only one whose handwriting is legible. Everyone else’s looks like chicken scratch.

She sent them out by carrier pigeon to save on postage.

Eve headed up the decorations committee. She was on a very tight budget, but Eve has a knack for getting her friends to work for nothing and consider it a privilege to do so.

For example, her friend Louella was thrilled when Eve asked her to make the party hats. There’s nothing Louella loves more than making fancy hats.

Eve’s friend Skylar did the floral arrangements. He has a real gift for it… not to mention a brother-in-law who owns a wholesale greenhouse.

Hannah was in charge of refreshments. We couldn’t afford a caterer this year, but fortunately Hannah has lots of friends who are really good at hunting and gathering.

Her pals Ambrose and Earlene said they’d be glad to help.

So did her buddy Wendell.

Even Phoebe and Vinnie pitched in.

Ada was in charge of entertainment. With such a tight budget, it was a challenge that would have scared off most birds.

But not Ada. She knew a barbershop quartet that would sing for any occasion in exchange for food and beer. She met them at her best friend Charlene’s engagement party last November.

She also has a friend who’s a stand-up comedian and who owed her a favor (she babysat his kids for him when he was in rehab), and she got him to tell some jokes.

To no one’s surprise, Otto didn’t get most of the jokes. Otto has always tended to be kind of humor impaired.

As usual, there was plenty of Bluebird Bitter on hand… maybe just a little too much.

When Bob has had too much to drink, he has a tendency to strike up conversations with inanimate objects.

Still, everyone agreed it was a great party… even the ones who couldn’t remember much the next morning!


Happy birthday, Bob

February 15, 2016

It’s hard to believe, but five years have passed since the bluebird of bitterness was hatched. Although Nan, Eve, Otto, Hannah, and Ada had hoped to throw a party to celebrate, plans were derailed when they all came down with bird flu. By the time everyone had recovered, it was too late to do any planning or preparation; so instead of a party, they just had birdseed birthday cake and watched this guy playing the “Angry Birds” theme on YouTube.


Happy birthday, Bob

February 16, 2015

Sunday was Bob’s birthday, so we held a little celebration. Last year’s party was a tough act to follow, but I think everyone agreed this year’s was even better… well, maybe not better, but just as good… okay, maybe not just as good, but pretty close. Here are some pictures Nan and Eve took:

The invitations said “casual attire,” but no one was surprised when Elvira showed up wearing a fancy sequined onesie. Elvira just doesn’t know the meaning of the word “casual.”

Ralph and Edna were the entertainment committee. They contacted a local talent agency and auditioned several acts, but Ralph kept falling asleep, so Edna had to make the final decision without his help.

That’s how we ended up with this clown doing tricks on a tricycle.

Wally was in charge of the food, and it was really good. Unfortunately, Wally hadn’t planned for such a large crowd, and there wasn’t enough to go around.

Things got a little contentious.

Otto had to make an emergency trip to the deli to get more sandwiches. He was pretty ticked off. He said Wally should have planned better. Wally said that he would have, if only certain birdbrains had had the decency to RSVP, as the invitations clearly indicated.

In an attempt to lighten the mood a little, Lavinia got up and warbled a few songs — “El Condor Pasa,” “Rockin’ Robin,” “Fly Like an Eagle,” “Bird on a Wire,” and the theme from “Bye Bye Birdie.”

The audience’s response was not uniformly positive. Fortunately,  Otto got back with more sandwiches just in the nick of time.

After lunch, Maxine led everyone in singing “Happy Birthday” to Bob.

You can tell from Bob’s expression how thrilled he was.

But then we had the biggest surprise of the day! Look who just flew in! It’s Great Uncle Arthur! And look what he brought with him…

COOKIES!


Happy birthday, Bob

February 15, 2014

The bluebird of bitterness was hatched three years ago today. To celebrate the occasion, we had a little party with the office staff.

This is the photographer Bob’s sister Ada hired for the party. Unfortunately, his camera wasn’t working, so all we have is what was caught on the hotel’s security cameras.

This is Blanche, who works in the mailroom. She was in charge of the invitations, which she sent out via Twitter.

Bob’s brother Otto hired this trio to sing for the party. They were pretty good, but LOUD. My ears are still ringing.

Bob’s sister Nan hired this guy to make the party hats. She said one of her friends recommended him. If I were Nan, I’d get new friends.

No one here has any clue who this kid is — she just happened to be passing through the courtyard while the party was going on. She stopped long enough to snap a few pictures, then she left. Maybe she works for the local TV station.

Smoking wasn’t allowed in the hotel, so Leonard and Marvin had to go up on the roof every time they wanted a smoke.

This is the caterer Bob’s sister Eve hired for the party. I think he’s her hairdresser’s second cousin. Or was it her next-door neighbor’s parole officer’s brother? One or the other….

A guest checking out the buffet.

Everyone raved about how good the food was.

To no one’s surprise, Ralph drank a little too much. Ralph is the reason we always have a designated flier.

Our branch managers, managing their branch.

One of the guests checking out the hotel pool.

A wonderful time was had by all.

Yes, ALL.

Can’t wait until next year!


Happy birthday, Bob

February 15, 2012

I started bluebird of bitterness on February 15, 2011, without any idea what I was getting myself into, and I have to admit it’s been a ridiculous amount of fun. WordPress informs me that the site has received 17,739 page views so far — not bad for an obscure little blog that’s just one year old. So here’s a big thank you to my readers, and happy birthday to the grumpy little bluebird who provided the inspiration for it all.


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