English major jocularity

July 26, 2022

 


English major jocularity

May 10, 2022

I don’t judge people based on race, creed, color, or gender. I judge people based on spelling, grammar, punctuation, and sentence structure.

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English literature: I will die for honor.

French literature: I will die for love.

American literature: I will die for freedom.

Russian literature: I will die.

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Imagine trying to learn English and finding out that butt dialing and booty calls are two different things.

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Wife: You need to do more chores around the house.

Husband: Can we change the subject?

Wife: All right. More chores around the house need to be done by you.

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How to write a good story: 1. Write a bad one. 2. Fix it.

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Dear people who type in all lowercase:

We are the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse and helping your uncle jack off a horse.

Sincerely,

Capital letters

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