Horsing around

October 10, 2016

Three race horses in adjoining stalls were arguing over which of them was the best.

“Of my last sixteen races, I’ve won ten,” said the first horse.

“Not bad,” said the second horse. “But of my last twenty-two races, I’ve won fourteen.”

“Impressive,” said the third horse. “But of my last twenty-nine races, I’ve won twenty-three.”

A greyhound who was lurking nearby overheard the horses arguing and decided to join the conversation.

“I don’t mean to brag,” said the greyhound, “but of my last forty-six races, I’ve won forty-four.”

The horses were clearly astonished. After a long silence, one of the horses said in an awestruck voice, “Wow! A talking dog!”


Find the hidden animals!

August 26, 2016

A hidden (or not-so-hidden) critter — or perhaps more than one — lurks within each of these critters. See how many you can find.

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

UPDATE: Solutions appear below, in the comment section.


Jingle all the way

December 6, 2012

A miniature horse named Tinker from West Bend, Wisconsin is one of the Salvation Army’s most successful bell ringers, bringing in donations at a rate far exceeding that of his human colleagues.


A horse of a different color

November 28, 2011

The tribal wisdom of the Dakota Indians, passed on from generation to generation, says that “When you discover that you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount.”

Not everyone subscribes to the Dakota’s view. In government and education, for example, more complex strategies are often employed — such as:

1. Using a bigger whip.

2. Changing riders.

3. Appointing a blue-ribbon committee to study the horse.

4. Arranging a foreign junket to observe how other cultures ride horses.

5. Lowering the standards so that dead horses can be included.

6. Reclassifying the dead horse as “living impaired.”

7. Hiring outside contractors to ride the dead horse.

8. Harnessing several dead horses together to increase speed.

9. Providing additional funding and training to improve the dead horse’s performance.

10. Doing a productivity study to see if lighter riders would improve the dead horse’s performance.

11. Declaring that as the dead horse does not have to be fed, it is less costly, and therefore contributes substantially more to the bottom line than a live horse.

12. Rewriting the expected performance requirements for all horses.

13. Promoting the dead horse to a supervisory position.

14. Instituting affirmative action quotas for dead horses.


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